Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
