Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
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