I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
