Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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