But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I intend to get homeless drunk
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
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