I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize