Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
