i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
