David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
