youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
