Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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