it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
