Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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