I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
