Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I love having hate sex.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
