I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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