The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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