do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
