rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
