She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
