i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
