did you get engaged???
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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