i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
