I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
