I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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