would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
