Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
