Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
