Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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