I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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