She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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