So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
