chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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