Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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