not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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