I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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