I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
my shit smells like andre
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
