she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
