he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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