She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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