Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
