Dude my mom stole all your condoms
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I booty called her while she was in labor.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
