Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
my god I love twenty year old dicks
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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