they need to just BURY HIM!
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
He better not be in your backpack
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
