Your mouth is God's brothel.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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