Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Randomize
