Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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