Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
