In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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