Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
