I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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